When you are in the right.

It is everyone's nightmare. Bad neighbors. I recently had a discussion with a relative who just had some bad neighbors move in just across the street from them. Due to the fact that they live on a dirt road that is basically a driveway, their houses are closer to one another than they would be were it a typical street. This couple has no children but everyone else in the neighborhood does.


It is not very often that my relative and her daughter go outside. They are so busy! However, when they are at home, they both love to be in the front yard a great deal. The daughter is quite popular with the other kids in the neighborhood. When she does come out to play, there are about a handful of children in my relatives yard. They play tag, kickball, and stand around and have typical girlie chatter. This drives the new neighbors absolutely insane. Mind you, it does not bother them when it is other children. Just my relative and her daughter. Every time this neighbor sees my relative outside, she tries to start arguments and yells obscenities at her. At first, the relative was trying to have a conversation with her and even yelling back. This did not work so my relative would sit on her porch and just let it happen. It was fine until the neighbor started calling her inappropriate names in front of the children. It has even gotten tot he point to where the cops had to come out and tell the new neighbors to stop yelling obscenities at people. While the cops advised both parties to get along, my relative does her best to say nothing at all to the new neighbor and keeps her children away from that side of the street at all costs.


Since the relative has been doing everything right, the new neighbor continues her assault of screaming and making rude gestures toward the relative every chance she gets. This is not fair to the relative and when incidents do occur, they are very taxing. The relative is usually thick skinned but is unable to handle such an unhappy human being hurling offensive assaults at her every chance she gets. Everyone on this street either owns the homes or is there for a term of longer than a couple of years. My relative has a beautiful home and she loves it very much but she is considering taking a loss on the home and moving away because of this neighbor.


From my point of view, this is unfair for someone to make a persons life THAT miserable when they are not even part of the home. What right does the new neighbor have to take out her frustrations on my relative when there is no issue at all. My relative has even went so far as to mark off the corners of her property to let her daughter and daughters friends know what the boundaries are when it comes to the neighbors and to eliminate any accidental trespass by her daughter. Why should someone have to go that far. The incidents where the new neighbor does her screaming have become more frequent and occur about every three days now. As a result, the relative is on medication for stress and depression. The Dr advised that she just needs to stay in the house when she sees the neighbor come outside. The only thing is, the neighbor ONLY comes outside when the relative is there.


What would YOU do in this situation?

Don't move to the beach. Its a trap.

Living at the beach is not all it is cracked up to be. Sure, if you have lots of money and are in the upper middle class it is a whole lot easier than living amongst the cogs that actually make this place work. For the longest time, I could not understand the idea of someone coming here for a visit and getting left then fully believing they are "stuck" here for no lack of a way home.  You have feet right?  Wrong.  Once you become a cog of the machine, it reels you in, sucks the lifeblood out of you and never lets you go.

Never.

The work is seasonal, you cannot afford anything and you have to work like a slave during the season just to barely scrape by in the off season. Even then, it only works if you can save your money and not let anyone know that you have a nickel to spare.  That leads to the lifetime beachers.  Those that have accepted their fate that they are here for life or those that have spent their entire lives at this beach and have no ambition to see other places or simply leave.  They are like vultures sitting on the side of the valley just waiting for you to drop dead so they can peck your eyes right out of your face.  They move in on you at the slightest twitch of weakness and then they hone in for the kill and suck the lifeblood out of you and then you assimilate and become one of them. Lifeless, bloodsucking, feelingless wretches that do nothing but suck you dry and leave your carcass for the wind to carry it out to sea.

For a long time I loved it here. It was nice to be able to go to the beach whenever you felt like and I love hot summers so this was a great place for me. But then we moved here and I still loved it but it slowly changed for me.

They became the predators and I became the prey.  There were other factors that led to the change however, this is the overpowering cause. My family was happy and we had everything we needed.  While we had not yet purchased a home, we had each other, we got along and there was not any strife among us. Then things began to change. These people are needy.  No, I am not talking about the ones that have things going for themselves.  I am talking about the cogs of this society that have to work for a living and scrape by from check to check.  They look at us 'outsiders' and say, "hmmmm....they have more than me.  We shall change that." And like vampires in the night, they do everything they can to make that happen.  They call at all times of the day and night and expect you to take them all over hell and creation.  This runs up your phone bill (if you are on an allotted minute plan, otherwise, it is just nuisance,) it puts a great deal of wear and tear on your car if you become their taxi service and they want to borrow shit.  ALL THE TIME.  You get promises of gas money and for return of your things and that will never happen.  Then they figure out what your schedule is and do everything they can to interfere with your home life with the incessant ringing of the phone (shut it off, now NOBODY can call you,) dropping by, take me here at 3 am.  Its bullshit and rubbish and needs to stop.

But it doesn't beause you write this person off then the next one does the same thing.  How can people live like that?  Do they not want better?  I have lived many places in my life but never one like this.  They also like to play mean jokes on people but that is for a different day.  Have you ever lived in a place that makes you feel like you have found Rancid Armpit, USA?  Tell me about it....

Tsk, Tsk, shakes head in "no-erly" fashion

I understand that priorities of everyone are different.  They are as stark as opinions, style, even the way we walk.  However, I want to believe that respect should come in the same form no matter who you are.  I want to start my rant this morning talking about respect in general.  I know, I know, I said I would start with the suggestions but I have to give those time to build and I need to reflect a little. Ah, but I digress.
Back to my "concern" for the day.  I can conceive that people treat their own belongings, also, with a different type of care than the next person. I get it that you do not care that your grass is never mowed or that you simply toss your trash out the window instead of properly disposing of it when you get home. What I simply cannot understand is how do you believe it is up to you to destroy something that does not belong to you?  That is lacking in respect to the nth degree.  Why bring this up?  Wonderful that you asked.
I come outside this morning and note tire tracks ALL THE WAY in our yard and the tree that was planted in my fathers name nearly laying on the ground and the bark skinned off one side of it.  I was alarmed NOT because they took it upon themselves to use our yard to turn their car around, (because this is not something new) but because of the lack of respect that our yard was clearly not theirs.  Further, I also happen to believe it was someone who did not live on our street.
The adage goes that you never know a person until you walk a mile in their shoes. Well, obviously nobody knew the tree they ran over either.  I have a special attachment to this tree and it was planted in Dad's honor because it was HIS tree.  When he was living, this sad little thing began to grow at the end of his place of residence.  Whenever we could come by, next to that tree is where he stood when he was getting some air.  He even told Calvin not to mow it over one day when he went to cut the grass for Dad many years back.  Well, that sad little thing, wild as it was, took root and began to grow.  The ground around the outside of Dad and Mom's place is not the most root friendly so it grew slowly.  It was about 12 inches when dad passed.  But I believe he loved it none the less.
The year dad passed, I decided to uproot the tree and bring it here. We are planting our own roots here and it would be nice to look out the window and be reminded of one of the better people that this planet had the privilege of presence.  I brought it here and it flourished.  While it is still a slow grow, it is about 3 feet tall.  Instead of growing an inch a year, I believe it to have grown about 8-10 inches per year.  I love "my" tree.
Imagine my horror to see one of the things in the world that give me happy thoughts nearly destroyed by someone with a gross lack of respect.
So, dear friends, it may not matter to you BUT it matters to someone and imagine how you would feel if someone did something similar to you.  If more people thought about things like that, then, this would be a much better place to live. Don't you think?
Feel free to comment below:                **Cheers**

UPDATE:  Since this was written, I am happy to say that the little tree survived and is a happy three feet tall now.  No permanent damage. My belief is that dad came down and used his angel powers to touch the tree and heal it. You know how it is. Daddy's little girl always believes that their fathers have superpowers! Mine is just now an angel! :)

Nothing to see here...move along now.

I am the first to admit that I am nosey.  How else do you make friends in high places unless you "know" a thing or two.  This may sound hypocritical (sp?) but I absolutely HATE it when people gawk and stare at me when I am in a situation.  While it does not happen much, it happens.

Everyone has that nightmare neighbor. You know, the one that wants to make your life absolutely miserable every chance they get. Well, we are fortunate to have one of those.  There has been some animosity over a gentlemens agreement over a fence so I choose not to say much to her and, for the most part, it stays pretty quiet. However, every now and again there are some issues.

Should we choose to mark the corners of our property, there is not much that you can do about it. It is private property and it is our business.  It is not up to outsiders to remove the marking. Especially if it is just inside the property line. I am so very sorry for you that you believe it to be in your way but that is not my problem. I am tired of you driving through my property to turn around and do your business.  Leave the marker alone and there will be no problems. The only problem that I see is that you do not know how to drive and you were the first one to bend the silly pole on MY property in the first place.

Do I sound like I am venting a little? Maybe just a little bit. I am not a big fan of conflict.  Conflict starts with the same letter as chaos and we all know that chaos is not on my list of things that make me smile. The way I see it. Live and let live. That was what the police told me anyway. I noted that I don't have to live with her but that I do have to live NEXT to her.  Now for the next few months, she will scream jamaican cursewords at me at the top of her voice every single time she sees me. Usually (10 times out of 10) I will have my kids with me and she will scare the bejesus out of them. That is not very nice. It is pretty annoying. But hey, I didn't start it. She can scream all she wants to. I am just going to sit there and look at her like she is being stupid. Because she really is.

All this drama over a property pole?  (As Bruce, from Family Guy may say.) Yes. Yes it is.  There, I feel a little better. Let's hope that this too, shal pass.