The Marshmallow Test

I recently seen a thing on TV where they took a group of 3 year olds and gave them a marshmallow and told themt hey had to hold it but wait to eat it. Those that did wait about 15 minutes or so were rewarded with a second marshmallow and they could then eat them both.  Those that didnt wait only got the one.  Simple enough.  They they followed these children through out their lives and into their early 20's or so.

They found that those that could accept delayed gratification were less streesed and better off in their lives than those who did not, overall.

O.o all over a marshmallow? 

Well, not really, it was an experiment related to parenting styles and that the parents that successfully taught delayed gratification to their children were setting them up to take disappointments in life with great stride.  Wow, such a simple thing can teach us wonders.

It makes you really consider how your parenting style affects your children and exactly how much they imitate what they see and how they adjust to life depending on the life lessons we teach them.  I try to teach my children to be survivors and I am guilty of the instant gratification thing. However, I wonder how whiners get away with it. I mean if a child will whine enough, most of the time they get their way and if they catch on to that, watch out. A lot of nerves will be pinched and a lot of teeth will be grinding.

I mean think about it. Children are great at manipulating their parents in some form or fashion. No matter the parenting style.  They are also great at imitating what they see and the stories they hear about "when I was your age."  I have seen it happen all to often that a parent will say to a child:

"Do as I say and not as I do"

Then the child will grow up and be exactly like the parent or even worse and then the parent wonders where they have gone wrong.  I can assure you that if you talked to them a lot along the way, they will file the good things away and reflect upon them when they make their own mistakes.  So long as you have not been abusive, or horrible to them, they still may turn out ok.  They do have to make their own mistakes and learn from them. Even when they are grown you can still talk to them. Still teach them by giving them the marshmallow and delaying the second one to see their response, if they cannot wait to eat the first one before getting the second one, then you have some work to do and we as parents can still work with our children to make them better people even if they are fourty years young.

They are still your children no matter how old they are.

What do you think about the marshmallow test?  See the link below for more information:

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2012/10/16/science-marshmallow-test-delayed-gratification/1636207/